Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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These are real notes left on doorsteps for milkmen:
Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby. Please leave another one.
Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk.
Cancel one pint after the day after today.
Please don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it.
Milkman, please close the gate behind you, because the birds keep
pecking the tops off the milk.
Milkman, please could I have a loaf but no bread today.
Sorry not to have paid your bill before, but my wife had a baby, and I've been carrying it around in my pocket for weeks.
Sorry about yesterday's note. I didn't mean one egg and a dozen pints
but the other way round.
When you leave my milk, knock on my bedroom window and wake me, because I want you to give me a hand to turn the mattress.
Please knock. My TV's broken, and I missed last night's Coronation Street.
If you saw it, will you tell be what happened over a cup of tea.
My daughter says she wants a milkshake. Do you do it before you
deliver, or do I have to shake the bottle.
Please send me a form for cheap milk, for I have a baby two months old
and did not know about it until a neighbour told me.
Please send me details about cheap milk as I am stagnant. Milk is needed for the baby. Father is unable to supply it.
From now on please leave two pints every other day and one pint on the
days in between, except Wednesdays and Saturdays when I don't want any milk.
My backdoor is open. Please put milk in fridge, get money out of cup in
drawer and leave change on kitchen table in pence, because we want to
play bingo tonight.
Please leave no milk today. When I say today, I mean tomorrow, for I
wrote this note yesterday.
When you leave the milk, please put the coal on the boiler, let dog out
and put newspaper inside the screen dorr. PS: Don't leave any milk.
No milk. Please do not leave milk at No. 14 either, as he is dead until
further notice.
Please cancel milk. I have nothing coming into the house but two sons
on the dole.
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LukeGSi
Member
Registered: 9th Dec 03
User status: Offline
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
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Natalie
Member
Registered: 5th Nov 03
Location: Oxfordshire Drives: Vauxhall Tigra 1.8
User status: Offline
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I thought it was quite good
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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Some were funny!
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LukeGSi
Member
Registered: 9th Dec 03
User status: Offline
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morning miss shelly
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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thank you Natalie.
morning
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sassyminx
Member
Registered: 10th Jan 04
Location: Hartlepool Drives: Cossie
User status: Offline
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hehe there funny......mmmmmm milkmen
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