pug306boy
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Registered: 6th Mar 03
Location: manchester, drives a carzone kitted 306 Hdi 2.0
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Michael Buerk watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer For warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: "They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts"
Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: "Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself"
Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: "Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets"
Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards' tyre choice on World Superbike racing: "Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now"
Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This Morning: "She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night"
Winning Post's Stewart Machin commentating on Jockey Tony McCoy's Formidable lead: "Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."
During the 1989 British Masters golf tournament, commentator Richie Benaud observed: "Notices are appearing at courses telling golfers not to lick their balls on the green"
Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during Durham v Lancashire match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe: "With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off"
Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: "There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: "Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."
The new stand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott's breath away...."My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."
Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big Race when he said: "They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions".
Steve Leonard, talking about vegetation on Vets In The Wild, told Trude:"There's something big growing between my legs."
Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live said: "You'd eat beaver if you could get it"
A female news anchor who the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half of the crew did too, because they were laughing so much!"
US PGA Commentator - "One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God!!!! What have I just said?!!!"
Ted Walsh - Horse racing Commentator - "This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."
New Zealand Rugby Commentator - "Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."
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sxibeast
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Registered: 6th Aug 03
Location: Milton Keynes
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PMSL!!!! sheer quality!!
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Stoneyginger
Premium Member
Registered: 25th Jan 01
Location: Stonehaven, Aberdeenshire
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 Hoooooooow good 
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pug306boy
Member
Registered: 6th Mar 03
Location: manchester, drives a carzone kitted 306 Hdi 2.0
User status: Offline
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cracked me up when i first read em too!
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the_legend_of_yrag
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Registered: 7th Jul 03
Location: Cambridgeshire
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heheheh heard some before 
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IntaCepta
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Registered: 25th Mar 02
Location: Mill Hill East, Greater London
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LIAM1
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Registered: 11th Aug 01
Location: Pontefract Yorkshire
User status: Offline
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Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This Morning: "She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night"
Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: "There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
female news anchor who the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half of the crew did too, because they were laughing so much!"
roflmao
quality
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kerzo
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Registered: 10th Nov 02
Location: Norn Iron
User status: Offline
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During the 1989 British Masters golf tournament, commentator Richie Benaud observed: "Notices are appearing at courses telling golfers not to lick their balls on the green"
does richie benaud not commentate on cricket?
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Icy
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Registered: 31st Jan 01
Location: Edinburgh Drives: Mk3 Golf Gti
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too many to read but
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