Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me.
Then i realised i had my ipod on 
[Edited on 20-08-2009 by Twiggy]
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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Not being cheeky or anything but that's not really a joke.
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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He can't hear you, he's got his iPod on...
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Eck
Premium Member
Registered: 17th Apr 06
Location: Lundin Links, Fife
User status: Offline
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Two drums and a symbol fall off a cliff....
Buh boom tish
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Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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As its summer and me being the big kid.i thought i would join in with the polish kids next door in the water fight.as soon as that kettles boiled im out there!
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Cosmo
Member
Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by MarkSport
As its summer and me being the big kid.i thought i would join in with the polish kids next door in the water fight.as soon as that kettles boiled im out there!
RACIST
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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whats orange and sounds like a parrot?
a carrot.
[Edited on 20-08-2009 by sc0ott]
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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I edited it to polish as it was meant to say paki's... 
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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what do you call an italian with a rubber toe?
Ruberto
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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I was following a magic tractor the other day.All of a sudden it turned into a field
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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have you seen that film about that tractor? i seen the trailor and its pretty good
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Cosmo
Member
Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
User status: Offline
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Wow, just when I thought the first joke in here was the worst it could get.
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Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by MarkSport
have you seen that film about that tractor? i seen the trailor and its pretty good
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Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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FPMSL i missed the punch line off Failzzzzzz
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Cosmo
Member
Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Twiggy
FPMSL i missed the punch line off Failzzzzzz
No shit you did!
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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the failed version sounds funnier than the actual joke itself.
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Cosmo
quote:
Originally posted by Twiggy
FPMSL i missed the punch line off Failzzzzzz
No shit you did!
I heard that joke before,but it sounded bettr when bizzle gave the punch line
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Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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I best not go near a jack in this state!!!
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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what do you call a guy with a car on his head?
Jack
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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what do you call a girl with tiles on her head
RUTH
what do you call a man with a spade on his head
DOUG
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sc0ott
Member
Registered: 16th Feb 09
User status: Offline
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what do you call a guy in a hole?
Phil
What do you call a guy lying on your doorstep?
Matt
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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A guy visits a prostitute,starts taking his clothes off when the prostitute farts. "thats sick" he said and left in a hurry. after realising the guy had left the money,the prostitute decided to try it on other guys as getting paid for no sex seemed like a better option
Her next customer was a big black carabian guy.He starts getting undressed so she lies on the bed and farts.... he continues to undress
after 5 farts and the guy nearly naked the prostitute says "can you not smell that?"
the guy replies "yeah i can,but when you see what i got for you you're going to shit yourself"
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Twiggy
Member
Registered: 15th Oct 04
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by sc0ott
what do you call a guy with a car on his head?
Jack
What do you call a lad with his car on the deck and an axle stand in the petrol tank?
Twiggy
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DannyB
Premium Member
Registered: 6th Feb 08
User status: Offline
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Whats green and smells of blue paint?
Green paint
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