Whittie
Member
Registered: 11th Aug 06
Location: North Wales Drives: BMW, Corsa & Fiat
User status: Offline
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... the birds love it.
Post some jokes up, could do with a giggle 
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BarnshaW
Member
Registered: 25th Oct 06
User status: Offline
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My son has cancer and is on his deathbed.
4 poster, pine £50 ono.
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BarnshaW
Member
Registered: 25th Oct 06
User status: Offline
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My wife broke down on the motorway today.
I should have waited until she got home to say her parents had died.
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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After the news that FIFA are planning on taking the World Cup to third world nations with a low ranking and a poor grasp of basic English, the Scottish FA confirms it will be making a bid for the 2026 event...
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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My girlfriend came home crying last night, so I asked what she expected me to do. She said I could at least console her.
So I smashed her in the face with my PS3
[Edited on 07-12-2010 by Bissmire]
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BarnshaW
Member
Registered: 25th Oct 06
User status: Offline
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My gran died last week. The funeral director said, "bury her with something she liked."
As the coffin lowered into the ground, all we could hear was grandad shouting for help.
I had a tear of pride in my eye this morning when I watched my wife and baby son in the bath together.
But other mornings I wish they weren't dead.
My grandad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.
"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
But a pepper-spray keeps the niggers at bay!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
But not if you have leukaemia.
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sand-eel
Member
Registered: 15th Mar 07
Location: carluke/braidwood--IRNBRULAND
User status: Offline
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One of my fav jokes....
What do you call a black guy that always laughs?
A snigger.
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by BarnshaW
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
But not if you have leukaemia.
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MJFF88
Member
Registered: 30th Apr 08
User status: Offline
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Sepp Blatter.
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?
Fo drizzle
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BarnshaW
Member
Registered: 25th Oct 06
User status: Offline
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Did you hear about the cheese-grater Stevie Wonder's wife got him for his birthday?
Most violent book he's ever read.
What's Black and doesn't work?
Stevie Wonder's Glasses.
Whats Stevie Wonders Favorite Colour?
Velcro.
Why did stevie wonder buy a kaleidoscope? For his niece
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MatthewR
Member
Registered: 21st Oct 02
Location: Rickmansworth
User status: Offline
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KAMMY
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Toby
Premium Member
Registered: 29th Nov 05
User status: Offline
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whats black on the top and white on the bottom
rape
* i do not condone rasicm or infact imply that people with a different skin tone to mine have problems with sexual agression and are criminals
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre
Whats brown and rhymes with trigger?
Nigger
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charcoalgrill
Member
Registered: 23rd Oct 02
Location: Bristol
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by BarnshaW
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
But not if you have leukaemia.
This made me , as one of my mates a few months ago went on in a facebook rant about how people who play cod are utter wankers and wasting their life.. a few months later he was diagnosed with Leukaemia...which lead to;
A COD ay day, keeps the doctors away
He see's the funny side to it.
Before someone calls us badgers- we raised £3,500 for Leukeamia charity, and will be in the local paper for it next week 
[Edited on 07-12-2010 by charcoalgrill]
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Bissmire
Member
Registered: 30th Sep 08
User status: Offline
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badgers
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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You're mum is so fat. She got baptised at sea world.
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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BarnshaW
Member
Registered: 25th Oct 06
User status: Offline
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batised?
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noshua
Member
Registered: 19th Nov 08
User status: Offline
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My wife is a real tiger in the bedroom.
400lbs and ginger.
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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Baptised barnshaw
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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sand-eel
Member
Registered: 15th Mar 07
Location: carluke/braidwood--IRNBRULAND
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by BarnshaW
batised?
Where you get that from?
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Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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i put it on facebook and spelt it wrong
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
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_Allan_
Member
Registered: 24th Mar 04
User status: Offline
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I just asked the mrs if she wanted to play the rapey rape game.
She said 'No!!!!!' 
I said, 'Good start'
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ashleh
Member
Registered: 23rd Dec 08
Location: Nottingham
User status: Offline
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My wife is extremely selfish and has no realistic understanding of our financial situation.
After a huge argument over presents and my lack of funds, she barged past me and hissed
"I'd better have something to unwrap on Christmas morning!"
"You can start with your fucking bandages!" I said; cracking her skull against the wall.
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ashleh
Member
Registered: 23rd Dec 08
Location: Nottingham
User status: Offline
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So, it finally seems that David Cameron is raising the uni fees. Not to worry, the last thing he tried to raise died at the age of six.
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