A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
Lived with the Mrs for 3 years now. For the past 12 months she's earned around £5k more than me, more out of luck landing a decent role than anything. Regardless we've always split everything 50/50, bills, mortgage etc.
To supplement my income I setup a small eBay business last year that I put a lot of time and effort into and it's reached the point I can take a lump sum from it. I hinted at treating myself to a MacBook Air and perhaps putting some left over into our house savings.
Basically she kicked off saying I'm selfish and we should be a team and were supposed to be saving for a bigger house and if I put more money in she would match it etc.
Am I being unreasonable?
[Edited on 28-05-2012 by A2H GO]
|
Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
|
Simple really, just dont tell her what you earn & the mac book was a gift 
|
Generation
Member
Registered: 7th Jul 09
Location: Essex
User status: Offline
|
Does she buy things for herself from
Wages?
TBH, it's down to your own circumstances
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
No that's what fucks me off. She literally never buys anything or treats herself, so can't use that argument.
|
Ian
Site Administrator
Registered: 28th Aug 99
Location: Liverpool
User status: Online
|
I'd be asking where her extra money had gone if she's bothered about yours above and beyond the existing 50:50 arrangement.
I'd also not be spending grands on a Mac but that's a whole other thread.
I assume there's no business case to you spending many times more than you need to on computer equipment?
|
Ian
Site Administrator
Registered: 28th Aug 99
Location: Liverpool
User status: Online
|
quote:
Originally posted by A2H GO
She literally never buys anything or treats herself, so can't use that argument.
So where is the money? 
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
Simple really, just dont tell her what you earn & the mac book was a gift
Got offered a new job today and we''ll be earning pretty much the same going forward.
|
Steve
Premium Member
Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
User status: Offline
|
Spending her money getting her vagina lips trimmed imo
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Ian
quote:
Originally posted by A2H GO
She literally never buys anything or treats herself, so can't use that argument.
So where is the money?
She puts her extra in her personal savings but says if I'd got the extra to put in joint savings she'd always
[Edited on 28-05-2012 by A2H GO]
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Ian
I'd be asking where her extra money had gone if she's bothered about yours above and beyond the existing 50:50 arrangement.
I'd also not be spending grands on a Mac but that's a whole other thread.
I assume there's no business case to you spending many times more than you need to on computer equipment?
And no there's no way I can justify spending an obscene amount of money on something I don't 'need' but it's a luxury that I've worked hard for that I've always wanted to own.
|
Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
|
I hate money arguments!!!!
|
Ian
Site Administrator
Registered: 28th Aug 99
Location: Liverpool
User status: Online
|
But she's working hard and saving.
I think you should have treats but also I don't think you've a case given how sensible she is being.
Only the plus side, your next house will be boss.
|
Sam
Moderator
Premium Member
Registered: 24th Dec 99
Location: West Midlands
User status: Offline
|
Split the bills, agree on a set amount each month for house savings, and the rest of your money is for you to do with as you please.
If she moans at you for that tell her to STFU.
Bloody women.
|
thegsi
Member
Registered: 3rd Feb 07
Location: Kidderminster Drives: Evo (you can't afford one)
User status: Offline
|
This is so close to home
My Mrs earns a lot less than me but has zero outgoings. We don't live together, don't have any children but she insists on "telling me off" about spending money on my car, yet she spends her wages how she likes.
You can either keep track on her spending and try and catch her out, start an arguement or just don't mention your little extra cash 
|
thegsi
Member
Registered: 3rd Feb 07
Location: Kidderminster Drives: Evo (you can't afford one)
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
I hate money arguments!!!!
95% of our arguements are about money. Its fucking ridiculous
|
baza31
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 03
Location: yorkshire
User status: Offline
|
Take the early wake up call. If she's arguing over money now wait till the house has been bought . Sounds like she's money orientated and too concerned about what you do with YOUR money. I earn it more than my partner, I don't tell her what I earn as it's nothing to do with her or anyone else.
I could be wrong but alarm bells are ringing from what uve wrote above
|
Kyle T
Premium Member
Registered: 11th Sep 04
Location: Selby, North Yorkshire
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
I hate money arguments!!!!
I cant think of anything worse, luckily my missus earns fuck all so it's easy for me to buy whatever the fuck I want
Once she is earning though, I've got a plan of splitting all the bills/mortgage/etc based on our salary ratio - which means I'll be paying in quite a lot more towards bills than she is - but I'll also get more spending money too.
We'll do the same for savings, and can't see what we'd have to argue about then!
Lotus Elise 111R
Impreza WRX STi
|
craig8
Premium Member
Registered: 31st Dec 04
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
|
I agree with sam tbh, I earn a fair bit more than the mrs so we set aside a joint account for the house, worked out how much we needed to pay bills and added extra for savings then split it with me paying 2/3rds
Whatever is left is our own money
E36 328
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
We split everything 50/50 which essentially means I put more in than her in comparison to what I earn(at work). We agreed that anything extra was our own.
TBH I set the business up as a bit of pocket money for treats but now she's cottoned on to the fact it's a bit more than pocket money it's got more complicated than that.
That said its always the same when I want anything, car, iphone, ipad etc, like a broken record. She doesn't see the interest in any of that(lads stuff) only saving for a bigger house.
[Edited on 28-05-2012 by A2H GO]
|
Ian
Site Administrator
Registered: 28th Aug 99
Location: Liverpool
User status: Online
|
Are we missing the point here - she has personal savings - she's not spending on herself.
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
This is true. What she's essentially saying is that if I wasn't selfish and put say £2k in the joint savings she would match it from her savings.
But if I didn't work my arse off till 2am most mornings we wouldn't even have the half of that I was proposing to put in.
|
Kerry
Member
Registered: 5th Oct 01
Location: Norwich
User status: Offline
|
My input
She earns more than you currently.
One day you will earn more thn her. For whatever reason I.e you have kids
DON'T CHUCK IT BACK IN HER FACE!
|
Tomnova16
Premium Member
Registered: 21st Jan 06
Location: Gerrards Cross Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
|
Tell her to stop being a twat and enjoy life. This means buying fancy things.
http://www.lemass.co.uk/ for all your automotive/bodyshop needs
Located in Chalfont st Peter
|
Sam
Moderator
Premium Member
Registered: 24th Dec 99
Location: West Midlands
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Kerry
My input
She earns more than you currently.
One day you will earn more thn her. For whatever reason I.e you have kids
DON'T CHUCK IT BACK IN HER FACE!
He's been paying half of all bills even though he earns less. He's even said he's going to put some money towards house savings.
What exactly is he chucking in her face? She is just being arsey with him for wanting to treat himself - it's not as though he just wants to buy expensive stuff and contributes little to nothing towards the bills?
|
A2H GO
Member
Registered: 14th Sep 04
Location: Stoke
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Tomnova16
Tell her to stop being a twat and enjoy life. This means buying fancy things.
That's where we're different. I'm a live for today kind of guy, always wanting to spend money and treat myself(and others) whereas she's always got her sensible hat on thinking about the long term. 9 times out of 10 that setup works well for us it's just the odd occasion that it can get difficult.
|
