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Author Sick Joke Thread
corsa - gus
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Registered: 8th Jan 07
Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
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5th Jun 09 at 08:00   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
What was Mark Bowlans last hit?

A tree
DannyB
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Registered: 6th Feb 08
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2nd Sep 09 at 22:13   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Bump for epic thread

Myra Hindley is walking through the Yorkshire Moors, hand-in-hand with a little boy.

"I'm scared," moaned the boy.

"You're scared!" she replied. "I have to come back alone."
DannyB
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Registered: 6th Feb 08
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2nd Sep 09 at 22:23   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
What's the difference between Paula Radcliffe and Adolf Hitler?

Hitler tried to finish the race.
am4nf
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Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
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2nd Sep 09 at 22:30   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
A girl asks her doctor

"how many calories are in cum?"

The doctor replies

"honey if you swallow, nobody cares if your fat"
am4nf
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Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
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2nd Sep 09 at 22:40   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Nigger in the jungle sees a monkey with a tin opener, he says "you dont need that to open a banana" monkey replies its for the custard you thick black cunt
am4nf
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Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
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2nd Sep 09 at 22:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
supposed to say c*nt instead of badger
MarkSport
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Registered: 22nd May 09
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3rd Sep 09 at 00:12   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
guy goes to the doctors complaining of pains coming from his rectum.the doctor takes a look inside and see's coins stuck inside ...

he tells the patiet to tense and the money starts popping out

after counting it the doctor found that there was £1,800 inside the patients rectum...

after telling the patient he got the reply

"ah i knew it didn't feel 2 grand
MarkSport
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Registered: 22nd May 09
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3rd Sep 09 at 00:49   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
girl goes to her dad and asks

"can i have a wendy house for xmas?"

her dad replies "only if you suck my dick"

she agree's amd starts sucking her dad off.

after a few minutes she says to her dad

"dad,why does your dick taste like shit?"

well said the dad,your brother want's a bike
MarkSport
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Registered: 22nd May 09
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3rd Sep 09 at 00:52   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
paddy and murphy walking down the street

paddy says to murphy "look at that beautiful forest"

murphy replies "i cant,the trees are in the way"
Pip308
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Registered: 25th Oct 07
Location: Basingstoke Drives: Audi A4 Avant, Mk1 Caddy
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3rd Sep 09 at 08:56   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Did you hear Princess Dianna was on the radio the other day.

She was also on the steering wheel and centre console.
Scotty_B
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Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
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3rd Sep 09 at 09:02   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MarkSport
paddy and murphy walking down the street

paddy says to murphy "look at that beautiful forest"

murphy replies "i cant,the trees are in the way"



Sick Joke Thread.
MarkSport
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Registered: 22nd May 09
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3rd Sep 09 at 12:57   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
i couldnt think of any
stan_the_man
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Registered: 14th Feb 07
Location: Perth, Western Australia
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3rd Sep 09 at 13:03   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Jordan:
Sexually assaulted and raped at a young age:
Drives a Bentley, owns horses, owns property, is a multi-millionaire.

Elizebeth Fritzl:
Take note... get your tits out!
corsa - gus
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Registered: 8th Jan 07
Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
User status: Offline
3rd Sep 09 at 13:29   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by stan_the_man
Jordan:
Sexually assaulted and raped at a young age:
Drives a Bentley, owns horses, owns property, is a multi-millionaire.

Elizebeth Fritzl:
Take note... get your tits out!


Thats a fucking belter
Leighton
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Registered: 21st Feb 01
Location: Liverpool
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3rd Sep 09 at 13:35   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Why do we have white chocolate?

So Black kids can get messy as well
Jakey
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Registered: 4th Jun 07
Location: Sandbach
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3rd Sep 09 at 15:14   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?

Dr Dre.
alan-g-w
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Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
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3rd Sep 09 at 15:27   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Scotty_B
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Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
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3rd Sep 09 at 15:28   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by stan_the_man
Jordan:
Sexually assaulted and raped at a young age:
Drives a Bentley, owns horses, owns property, is a multi-millionaire.

Elizebeth Fritzl:
Take note... get your tits out!


N3CRO
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Registered: 12th Apr 07
Location: Sandy, Bedfordshire
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3rd Sep 09 at 15:34   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by am4nf
A girl asks her doctor

"how many calories are in cum?"

The doctor replies

"honey if you swallow, nobody cares if your fat"


GF-91
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Registered: 8th Jul 09
Location: Burnley!
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3rd Sep 09 at 18:16   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by CorSRi_BT
quote:
Originally posted by MarkSport
paddy and murphy walking down the street

paddy says to murphy "look at that beautiful forest"

murphy replies "i cant,the trees are in the way"



Sick Joke Thread.

ed_jones
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Registered: 23rd Mar 03
Location: Wrexham / Shropshire Border
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3rd Sep 09 at 22:40   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?



GANG RAPE!!
alan-g-w
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Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
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4th Sep 09 at 00:24   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Lol, these are excellent.
am4nf
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Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
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4th Sep 09 at 00:27   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
JOB VACANCY:
small black person wanted, must be flexible and willing to travel

JOB DESCRIPTION:
mud flap
am4nf
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Registered: 27th Jul 08
Location: South Ayrshire Drives: Corsa Sport
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4th Sep 09 at 00:29   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Consultant surgeon says to colleague, did you tell the paki in bed 9 he only has a week to live?

Yes, he replied

Ahhh you c*nt i wanted to tell him

[Edited on 04-09-2009 by am4nf]
liamgallagher1994
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Registered: 12th Aug 07
Location: Chesterfield Drives: JDM Honda Integra DC2
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4th Sep 09 at 00:36   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
A blonde goes into pc world looking for some curtains for her pc, the assistant says ' You dont need curtains for a computer ' Blonde says ' HELLO its got fucking windows ! '


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