Nismo
Member
Registered: 12th Sep 02
User status: Offline
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so there i was belting along at a heart stopping 50mph in my 1.3 nova, minding my own business one hand on the wheel the other gently cupping my balls......All of a sudden i see lights coming up fast behind me, "must be a man with a couple of torches running really fast" FOOK THAT!!!!
I drop down into 3rd and as i bring the clutch up the man is alongside me, his torchlights are going crazy as his arms flail up and down, then i realise "its a woman" and some friends, they tearing it up like nothing i ever seen, surely they are wearing some kinda footwear that incorporates an air bubble and torsion bar
i was pissed, they cruised past rubbing it in that they could run faster than my car, managed a pic

i lean forward, to my amazement the speedo goes up by 10mph, "ITS WORKING, ITS WORKING!!!" i yell, at this point i felt like Jim carrey in the film ace ventura. I get as close to the windscreen as possible, surely i'll hit 80mph after these shananagans.
then it hits me!!!!!!!
why not vtec them?????
now i know what your thinking a 1.3 nova doesn't have any vtec, well mine is no normal nova, last time i filled up i also grabbed a "vtec in a tin"
i fumble around the glovebox like a herion addict that dropped his drugs, TAAADAAAA!!!! i got the vtec in my hands, it looks so shiny, i open the tin with my teeth and spit the lid out the window like its part of a grenade (tbh its probably more damaging)
The vtec inside doesn't look how i thought it would and it smells like kung pao, either way i know i'm about to experience something from my wildest dreams, i look around and every other car looks inferior as they didn't buy any vtec, only baked beans for these mere mortals, good for the heart apparantely
i pour the vtec into the ignition barrel, man this shite is lumpy, some is on my leg, instantely the speedo goes....................
to be continued............
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Nismo
Member
Registered: 12th Sep 02
User status: Offline
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He is a led-gend this has made my day!
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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WTF 
BTW:
Yes we do chg for delivery reports and no set date for the N95... not even been fully assessed yet apparently
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A1EX
Member
Registered: 29th Mar 00
Location: Turku, Finland
User status: Offline
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LMAO very good
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K2 GTi
Member
Registered: 21st Oct 04
User status: Offline
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Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
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Trying to hard................
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Jamie Walby
Member
Registered: 15th Nov 04
User status: Offline
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--Dave--
Banned
Registered: 17th Feb 04
Location: Essssseeeeex Drives: Black Supra TT
User status: Offline
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Colin
Trying to hard................
way, way, way too hard
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Mather.16v
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Registered: 1st Nov 04
Location: Stockport
User status: Offline
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Dav
Member
Registered: 23rd Jul 02
Location: Falkirk, Scotland
User status: Offline
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K2 GTi
Member
Registered: 21st Oct 04
User status: Offline
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I wanna read part 2
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skell
Member
Registered: 18th Sep 05
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Ally
quote: Originally posted by Colin
Trying to hard................
way, way, way too hard
agree, needs to be funny
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