jibjob
Member
Registered: 6th Apr 08
Location: Elworth, Cheshire
User status: Offline
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Some say he appears on high value stamps in Sweden, and that he can catch fish with his tongue...
Some say he can swim seven lengths underwater, and he has webbed buttocks...
Some say he has a digital face, and that if he felt like it, he could fire Alan Sugar...
Some say he invented Branston Pickle, and that if you insult his mother he will headbutt you in the chest...
Some say he is illegal in 17 US states, and he blinks horizontally...
Some say he isn’t machine washable, and all his potted plants are called Steve...
some say he likes bum off jeremy clarkson and he has no penis...
Some say he naturally faces magnetic north, and that all his legs are hydraulic...
Some say he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves...
Some say he once lost a canoe on a beach in the northeast...
Some say he once threw a microwave oven at a tramp, and long before anyone else, he realized
that Jade Goody was a racist pig-faced waste of blood and organs...
Some say he recently pulled out of I'm a Celebrity because he's frightened of trees....and Australia...Koo Stark...and Ant...and Dec...
Some say he was turned down for a place in 'im a celebrity' because he is one. and that he has some terrible plans involving the moon...
Some say he watched the lord of the rings sixty twelve times and he was pissed off at gandalf for stealing his idea for a halloween costume...
Some say he’s wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...
Some say he's banned from the town of Chichester...
Some say he's seen The Lion King 1780 times, and that his second best friend is a cape buffalo... all we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is the Stig's African cousin.
Some say he's the main cause of global warming and his stomach is reverse engineered to make the I-Phone...
Some say he's wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...
Some say his droppings have been found as far north as York. And that he has a full size tattoo of his face, on his face...
Some say his ears have a paisley lining, and he’s been banned from the Chelsea Flower Show...
Some say his favourite ever song is Forever Autumn by Justin Hayward, and that he has the world's largest collection of pornographical material. All we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is The Stig's lorry-driving cousin!
Some say his skin has the texture of a dolphin’s, and that wherever you are in the world if you tune your radio to 88.4 you can actually hear his thoughts...
Some say if you see into his eyes you turn to stone and he had a playboy magazine in his hands when he was born...
Some say it's impossible for him to wear socks, and he can open a beer bottle with his testes!...
Some say one of his legs get longer when he sees a pretty lady. And that I haven't done one of these for some time and I've forgotten to make up a second thing...
Some say that after making love, he bites the head of his partner, and that he's had to give up binge-drinking now that it 's got to £1.18 a litre...
Some say that as we speak he is actually relaxing in the resort pool, and he is, he is actually.
Some say that each of his toenails are exactly the same as a woman's nipples. And that he thinks the credit crunch is some kind of breakfast cereal...
Some say that he doesn't like to get his helmet wet. A point that was proved last week when he was caught in the back of shot by an eagle-eyed viewer...
Some say that he gets terrible eczema on his helmet, and that if he'd been the video referee at the World Cup Rugby Final, he'd have seen 'of course it was a try you blind Australian half-wit'!...
Some say that he has no understanding of clouds, and that his earwax tastes like Turkish Delight...
Some say that he invented November. And that if he had won the World Championship in Brazil last weekend, there might have been one photograph of him without his father, gurning in the back of shot...
Some say that he is a CIA experiment that went wrong, and that he only eats cheese. All new know is that he's not The Stig - he's The Stig's fat American cousin
Some say that he is not allowed, by law, within 100 yards of Lorraine Kelly, and that he's never seen an episode of Top Gear, because he's a huge fan of Midsomer Murders! All we know is, he's called Bergerac!
Some say that he knows 2 facts about ducks, and both of them are wrong. And that 61 years ago he accidentally introduced Her Majesty The Queen to a Greek racialist. All we know is, I'm going to the tower now to have my head cut off...
Some say that he lives in a tree, and that his sweat can be used to clean precious metals...
Some say that he once had a vicious knife fight with Anthea Turner, and that he is in no way implicated in the cash for honours scandal... all we know is, he's called Lord Stig!
Some say that he once lost a canoe on a beach in the northeast, and that he once did some time in a prison in Canterbury, because his teddy is called The Baby Jesus...
Some say that he once threw a microwave oven at a tramp, and that long before anyone else he realised that Jade Goody was a racist pig-faced waste of blood and organs...
Some say that he sleeps inside out, and that he once had full sex with Russell Brand's answering machine...
Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and that his crash helmet is modelled on Britney Spears’ head...
Some say that he thought Star Wars was a documentary, and that he recently pulled out of I'm A Celebrity because he is scared of trees... and Australia... and Koo Stark... and Ant... and Dec...
Some say that he’s terrified of ducks, and that there’s an airport in Russia named after him...
Some say that he's banned from the town of Chichester, and that in a recent late-night deal, he bought a slightly dented white Fiat Uno from the Duke of Edinburgh...
Some say that he's terrified of ducks, and that there's an airport in Russia named after him...
Some say that his breath smells of magnesium, and that he’s scared of bells...
Some say that his ears aren’t exactly where you’d expect them to be, and that once, preposterously, he had an affair with John Prescott...
Some say that his first name really is "The," and that if he went on Celebrity Love Island, they'd all be pregnant, including the cameramen...
Some say that his genitals are on upside down, and that if he could be bothered he could crack the Da Vinci code in 43 seconds...
Some say that his heart is in upside down, and that his teeth glow in the dark...
Some say that his heart ticks like a watch, and that he’s confused by stairs...
Some say that his politics are terrifying, and that he once punched a horse to the ground...
Some say that his scrotum has its own small gravity field, and that because our producer rigged a phone vote, he now has a new name. All we know is, he's called Cuddles.
Some say that his tears are adhesive, and that if he caught fire he’d burn for a thousand days...
Some say that his voice can only be heard by cats, and that he has two sets of knees...
Some say that if you lick his chest it tastes exactly the same as Piccalilli, and that at this week’s Brit awards he was arrested for goosing Russell Brand...
Some say that on really warm days he sheds his skin like a snake, and that for some reason he’s allergic to the Dutch...
Some say that some cannot say because the Stig can make some not say what they want to say and all i want to say is i don't know what the hell i'm trying to say...
Some say that the outline of his left nipple is exactly the same shape as the Nurburg ring, and that if you give him a really important job to do, he’ll skive off and play croquet...
Some say that to unlock him, you have to run your finger down his face, and that if he was getting divorced from Paul McCartney, he'd keep his stupid whiny mouth shut!...
Some say that when he slows down brake lights come on in his buttocks, and that if he'd been the manager of the England football squad last week, he wouldn't have been a feckless ginger gum-chewing buffoon who ruined it for all of us...
All we know is he's called The Stig 
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Ste
Premium Member
Registered: 5th Mar 03
Location: Taif, Saudi Arabia
User status: Offline
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:yawn:
I would rather lose by a mile because i built my own car, than win by an inch because someone else built it for me.
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Eck
Premium Member
Registered: 17th Apr 06
Location: Lundin Links, Fife
User status: Offline
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How do people know his eyes blink horizontally if he never blinks?
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corsa_chris_w
Member
Registered: 31st Jan 10
Location: leeds
User status: Offline
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haha must of taken u ages to write that unless u cheated copy and paste lol
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MarkSport
Member
Registered: 22nd May 09
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by jibjob
Some say he’s wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...
Some say he's banned from the town of Chichester...
Some say he's seen The Lion King 1780 times, and that his second best friend is a cape buffalo... all we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is the Stig's African cousin.
Some say he's the main cause of global warming and his stomach is reverse engineered to make the I-Phone...
Some say he's wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...
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jibjob
Member
Registered: 6th Apr 08
Location: Elworth, Cheshire
User status: Offline
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I couldnt be bothered to write them all out so i did copy and paste  Some of them are pretty funny but you can tell they ran out of things to say after the first couple of series and thats why theyve done pretty much the same things again
Mark i was tired  Not bad missing only one though seeing as theres 3 websites worth!
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