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Author can someone give there opinion on this covering letter for a job im applying for
Kris TD
Member
Registered: 25th Mar 02
Location: Ware, Hertfordshire
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 15:24   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
cheers guys ::


Dear Sir

I am wishing to apply for a full time job in your health and fitness department / reception department.

After completing 2 years of my engineering degree I reconsidered my career plans and decided I would like to carry on working in the sport and leisure industry on a full time basis. Due to my experience working at sport and fitness centres at which I undertook several roles from leisure attendant, receptionist to duty manager I feel I have a lot too offer your company.

From my previous work experience I have had a lot of interaction with members of the public whether it would be assisting them, giving advice or dealing with any queries that arose. By working at the outdoor pool with a bather load capacity of 300 it has given me a lot of insight and knowledge of communication with the public and working well as part of a team, which is imperative for the safety of customers and staff.

I enclose a copy of my CV and I hope to hear from you in the near future.

Yours Faithfully


[Edited on 25-08-2003 by Kris TD]

[Edited on 25-08-2003 by Kris TD]
Ally
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Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 15:27   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
very nice
stuyw
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Registered: 15th May 02
Location: North West Drives: Rev3 MR2 Turbo
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 15:27   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
seems ok m8, but 'too' is spelt 'to' and u should put arose and not arise
Kris TD
Member
Registered: 25th Mar 02
Location: Ware, Hertfordshire
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 15:30   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
corrected, need others too read it as i dont notice mistakes myself, lol cheers



[Edited on 25-08-2003 by Kris TD]
Phil321
Member
Registered: 10th Mar 01
Location: Manchester
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 17:48   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
How I would have written it..........

Dear Sir,

I am wishing to apply for a full time job in your health and fitness department / reception department.

Having completed 2 years of my engineering degree and after reconsidering my career options, I have decided that I would like to work in the sport and leisure industry on a full time basis. My prior experience working within the industry, experience which included roles as leisure attendant, receptionist and duty manager, makes me confident that I have a great deal to offer your company.

My previous positions have included a lot of interaction with members of the public whether it be assisting them, giving advice or dealing with any queries that arose. In addition, working at an outdoor pool with a bather load capacity of 300 has given me a valuable insight into, and knowledge of, communication with the public. I also work equally well either independantly or as a part of a team, something I consider to be imperative for the safety of customers and staff alike.

I enclose a copy of my CV and look forward to hearing from you in the near future.

Yours Faithfully
Dan B
Member
Registered: 25th Feb 01
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 19:30   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Isn't it "Yours faithfully" when you address it to a specific person, and "Yours sincerely" when you address it vaguely (ie. Dear Sir/Madam, or To whom it may concern, etc)?
Fraser Young
Member
Registered: 26th Dec 02
Location: Dundee City Drives: 58 Impreza WRX
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 19:38   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Also handwrite the covering letter an type the CV...
Gaz
Member
Registered: 24th Aug 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 20:18   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
if u write sir/madam its faithfully
if its dear "mr jones" is sinserly

u carnt have two "s" together (sir+sincerly ) LOL

damn aint i sad knowing that
Dan B
Member
Registered: 25th Feb 01
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 20:23   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Can tell how long it's been since I had to write a covering letter......been in a decent job since 2001!
Gaz
Member
Registered: 24th Aug 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 20:26   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
i work with letters allday long i hate it want a new job
Ian
Site Administrator

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Registered: 28th Aug 99
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 21:51   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
I would say 'I wish to apply', not am wishing.

Also is there a job title you can add to the first line?
Kris TD
Member
Registered: 25th Mar 02
Location: Ware, Hertfordshire
User status: Offline
25th Aug 03 at 23:03   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
excellent, cheers phil, much better effort than mine

ian, they havent advertised specific jobs, just departments which require staff

 
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