Jamie
Member
Registered: 1st Apr 02
Location: Aberdeen
User status: Offline
|
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Irish equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
>
>This is a true story.
>
>Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.......
>
>Dear Sir,
>In response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
>
>I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
>
>You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form. Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
>
>Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.
>
>At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
>
>This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body. Then my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
>
>I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
>
>I hope this answers your inquiry.
>
>Kind Regards,
|
CorsaLad16v
Member
Registered: 5th Mar 03
Location: Sheffield UK Drives: VW Golf
User status: Offline
|
cant be assed to read it... summerise for me  
|
Matt H
Member
Registered: 11th Sep 01
Location: South Yorkshire
User status: Offline
|
read it 
|
CorsaLad16v
Member
Registered: 5th Mar 03
Location: Sheffield UK Drives: VW Golf
User status: Offline
|
i shall read it... give me 5 mins n i'll get back to ya 
|
CorsaLad16v
Member
Registered: 5th Mar 03
Location: Sheffield UK Drives: VW Golf
User status: Offline
|
yes i read it quite funny, wasted 3 or 4 mins of my life reading it tho
summery - bricklayer, bricks, 6th floor, pulley, loss of compsure, up, down, broken man, fool, barrel, broken legs
|
CorsAsh
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
User status: Offline
|
Old joke, but still good
|
TNM
Member
Registered: 5th Apr 04
Location: Nottingham Drives: VW Tiguan
User status: Offline
|
yer dont think its realy. but still funny.
|
Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
|
|
Siberia
Member
Registered: 9th Oct 03
Location: Leprechaun Land Drives : Zafira GSI
User status: Offline
|
That is taken form an irish drinking song Called "Why Paddys Not at work today"
its is sang at nearly every wedding i've been at.
i'll try and find it later... the song sounds very funny when its sang in a bogger irish accent.
|
Adam-D
Member
Registered: 11th May 02
Location: Cheshire
User status: Offline
|
pmsl
|
vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
|
tis ok but I'd not say PMSL
|
L330wnz
Member
Registered: 9th Mar 04
Location: Norwich, Norfolk
User status: Offline
|
quite funny
|
Pablo
Member
Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
User status: Offline
|
LOL
|
