flybikeslee
Member
Registered: 2nd Jan 07
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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'Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
I have been with a loose girl'.
The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'
'Yes, Father, it is.'
'And who was the girl you were with?'
'I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation'.
"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later
so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'
'I cannot say.'
'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'
'I'll never tell.'
'Was it Nina Capelli?'
'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'
'Was it Cathy Piriano?'
'My lips are sealed.'
'Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?'
'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'
The priest sighs in frustration.
'You're very tight lipped, and I admire that.
But you've sinned and have to atone.
You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months.
Now you go and behave yourself.'
Joey walks back to his pew,
and his friend Franco slides over and whispers,
'What'd you get?'
'Four months vacation - and five good leads.'
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johnhara1
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Registered: 19th Oct 06
Location: Newcastle upon Tyne
User status: Offline
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Daimo B
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Registered: 20th Mar 00
User status: Offline
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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Stolen from last months FHM?
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alan-g-w
Member
Registered: 9th Nov 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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A priest's going on holiday and asks his friend to cover for him. His friend makes the point that he's not got a clue how to be a priest, but the father assures him it'll be OK - he's only going away for a couple of days so the only thing that his friend will need to cover him for is confession. The priest explains that it's simple, he'll write him a list of answers and all the guy will need to do is bless people. Plus he says he'll give him 20 quid, so the guy agrees.
The first night and the priests' mate is sitting in the confessional booth. He hears someone coming in the door so sits himself up nervously, clears his throat and gets himself ready. It turns out to be a young guy in his 20's and enters the booth saying 'forgive me father for I have sinned, I stole today'. The stand-in priest looks through his list, sees stealing at the top and blesses the man by giving him 3 hail mary's and 1 jesus christ.
Next, a middle aged woman comes in and explains to the 'priest' that she has been having an affair. He looks at his list, spots adultery and in turn gives her 2 hail mary's and 2 jesus christ's.
He's getting pretty settled into his new position now, just as a stunning young blonde with massive tits comes in through the doors of the chapel. He sits himself up confidently and asks the girl how she has sinned.
'Forgive me father, for I have commited fellatio' she says. A bit shocked, the guy turns to his list and looks to see what he needs to say to her. He's frantically searching through not able to find anything, when through a crack in the confessional booth door he sees an alter boy passing by. Quickly, he sticks his head out the door and says 'Here, little boy. What does the priest usually give for a blow job?'
To which he gets the reply:
'A mars bar and a packet of crisps...'
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flybikeslee
Member
Registered: 2nd Jan 07
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Robbo
Stolen from last months FHM?
possibly, was in an email i got sent
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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it was
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sxibeast
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 03
Location: Milton Keynes
User status: Offline
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