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Author Christmas Jokes
Leighton
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Registered: 21st Feb 01
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
17th Dec 09 at 11:27   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

I need some risky but usable Christmas Jokes.
Tell me what you have

willay
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Organiser: South East, National Events
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Registered: 10th Nov 02
Location: Roydon, Essex
User status: Offline
17th Dec 09 at 11:29   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Not a joke but I'm sure it will go down well

To the tune of Mistletoe and Wine....

DREAMING OF A SCOUSE CHRISTMAS...

Christmas time, drunkenness and crime,
Children playing - in filth and grime,
With cars on fire - and trainees under tree
Time to rejoice - in be-ing scally,

It's a time for stealing, a time for receiving,
Knock-off gear - worra great feelin
Why pay top dollar - yer can nick it for free,
Just like our lecky, - gas and TV

Christmas time, píssups all the time
Nicking ciggies, - spirits and wine
Wearing-shell-suits and Nykees - all knocked off gear
It's great getting píssed - on someone else's beer

Its a time for drinkin - six packs of Stella
Dat yer got - from some dodgy Fella
Christmas is sound - Christmas is best
God bless our Cilla - and the DHSS

Christmas time - time to joy-ride
Then go and visit - family inside
With Dad on a six stretch - and sis up the duff
This 'City of Culcher' can get pretty rough

So next time your driving - through Liverpool-city
You may just know why - the streets look so shítty
So keep a sharp eye out - for those dodgy deals
But don't drive too slow - or they'll pinch all four wheels
All Torque
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Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
User status: Offline
17th Dec 09 at 12:13   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

What's pink and goes round on a carousel?







Stephen Gately's suitcase.
noshua
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Registered: 19th Nov 08
User status: Offline
17th Dec 09 at 15:03   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

What's the different between Santa and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops after 3 ho's.

 
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