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Author jokes - Yes I Am Bored
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:28   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Car Trouble

Two blondes were shopping at the mall. When they were done, they went out to their car, which happened to be an awesome
leather-interior convertible, but they realized they had locked the keys in the car. So they both kind of stood there and thought for a
while.
Then one of the girls had the bright idea to try to open the car with a coat hanger, so she started fiddling with the lock. The other
blonde looked up at the sky, became very worried, and pleaded,
"Hurry up!!! It looks like it's going to rain and we have left the top down!"

shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:31   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Shampoo

A blonde and a brunette are both in an elevator.
On the third floor a man gets on who's perfect: Italian suit, handsome, great build with a nice butt, but unfortunately they both notice
he has a bad case of dandruff.
The man gets off on the 5th floor.
Once the doors close, the brunette turns to the blonde and says, "Someone should give him Head & Shoulders."
To which the blonde replies, "How do you give Shoulders?"
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:34   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Doctor

A brunette goes to the doctor and as she touches each part of her body with her finger she says, "Doctor it hurts everywhere. My
arm hurts, my leg hurts, my back hurts, my head hurts!" The doctor asks, "Were you ever a blonde?" "Yes, I was. I dye my hair." she
replies. "Why do you ask?" The doctor answers, "because your finger is broken."
Tim
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Registered: 21st Apr 00
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21st May 03 at 01:38   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Keep em coming
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:40   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A. You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
User status: Offline
21st May 03 at 01:40   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips?
A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

i just thought of something im blonde lol
Tim
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Registered: 21st Apr 00
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21st May 03 at 01:42   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:

i just thought of something im blonde lol



Now *THAT* is funny

[Edited on 21-05-2003 by Tim]
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:43   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Nuns

Nuns are admitted to Heaven through a special gate and are expected to make one last confession before they become angels. Several nuns are lined up at this gate waiting to be absolved of their last sins before they are made holy. "And so," says St. Peter, "have you ever had any contact with a penis?" "Well," says the first Nun in line, "I did once just touch the tip of one with the tip of my finger." "OK" says St. Peter, "Dip your finger in the holy water and pass on into heaven."
The next Nun admits that "Well, yes, I did once get carried away and I, you know, sort of massaged one a bit." "OK" says St. Peter, "Rinse your hand in the holy water and pass on into heaven." Suddenly there is some jostling in the line and one of the nuns is trying to cut in front. "Well now, what's going on here?" says St. Peter. "Well, your excellency," says the Nun who is trying to improve her position in line, "If I'm going to have to gargle that stuff, I want to do it before Sister Mary Thomas sticks her arse in it!"

shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:44   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

what is tim
Tim
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Registered: 21st Apr 00
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21st May 03 at 01:55   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Read me edit. Night night
Munchie
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Registered: 17th Jul 01
Location: I swap goats for mobile phones
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21st May 03 at 01:56   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quality
shkita
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Registered: 28th Apr 03
Location: merthyr tydfil
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21st May 03 at 01:58   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

lol ok it was meant to be serious lol
mav
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Registered: 19th Jun 01
Location: Scotland
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21st May 03 at 03:12   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quality material..
Leighton
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Registered: 21st Feb 01
Location: Liverpool
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21st May 03 at 07:59   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

A woman goes to the doctors and says:
Doctor I have these to green rings on my inside led?? And shows the doctor.
The doctor has a look and waits fore a moment then says:
Can I ask you a personal question are you a lesbian??
The woman says well if I can’t tell you who can I tell, yes I am. You don’t think the green rings are lergy ore something terrible do you???
The doctor says well I have some good news and some bad, the good news is you do not have lergy or and illness at all, the bad news is your girlfriends earrings are not real gold.


 
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